Asteriskgate

Don Shula said earlier this week that the New England Patriots should get an asterisk next to their record if they finish the season undefeated, since the record would be tainted by the "Spygate" scandal when they were penalized for filming the Jets sidelines on the first week of the season. (Why does every scandal these days need to be prefaced with "-gate"?)

Shula's 1972 Miami Dolphins were the last NFL team to go undefeated, way back in the year of Watergate (now that makes sense as a "-gate"!), but several teams have come close. The 1976 Raiders should never have lost that one game, the 1984 or 1989 49ers could have easily gone undefeated, and I don't know how the 1985 Chicago Bears ever lost a game.

I was only seven when the year the Dolphins went undefeated, but I remember that they really weren't dominant in the same way those 80s teams were and New England is this year. They just never lost. The 1972 Dolphins were helped a lot by being in a weak division, just like the 2007 Patriots are (in the same AFC East/North division) and clinched the division title early on, just like New England is about to do this year.

I think the lack of competition in their own division is the main reason the Patriots probably won't go undefeated this year. They will have an easier time with their 6 conference games, but won't be ready when the tough games come. Their victory over the Colts last week meant that this year's AFC championship will be played in Foxboro instead of Indy, and in a few weeks, they'll have everything wrapped up and won't have a whole lot to play for. The 1972 Dolphins won the AFC East by 7 games, and after week 9, the chance of an undefeated season was the only thing that kept them motivated to keep winning.

It's hard to talk about sports and asterisks without mentioning Barry Bonds. The guy who won the online auction for Bonds' 756th HR said that he would donate the ball to the Baseball Hall of Fame branded with an asterisk. Barry said he would never appear at Cooperstown, even to be inducted, if they display his home run ball with an asterisk. "There's no such thing as an asterisk in baseball" he said. Tell that to Roger Maris.

I'd like to see Major League Baseball follow the Onion and preface Bonds' name in the record books with an asterisk, a pound Sign, an exclamation Point, and a letter 'F'. In reverse order.

"F*#! Barry Bonds, 756 F*#!^&% home run".

If they replace the asterisks with percent signs or some other glyph, they might even get Barry to visit his 756th home run ball!